Monday, May 05, 2014


A few weeks ago, shortly after we put the kids to bed I hear Aowyn coughing but to me it sounded more like a throw up cough then just a cough. Noah went upstairs to check on her and right before he opened the door I heard her soft sweet tiny voice cry out, "Dada!" It broke my heart. He opened the door and she was standing there with throw up all over her face and in her hair. He took her into the bathroom and put her in the bath where she was crying the whole time. I changed out the sheets on her bed and held her downstairs in my arms, with her cuddled up under her towel. I put some oil on her to help her with her cough and she just layed there so soft and sweet. 

We put her to bed in our bed and Noah asked me if I wanted to lay down with her, just then she walked up behind him and said, "Mama?" So of course I couldn't say no to my sweet girl. I layed in bed with her and she grabbed my hand and held it in hers, she laced her tiny little fingers in mine and I rubbed her hand. She rested her head on mine and fell asleep. After about 5 minutes she sat up and leaned over to me, I grabbed the bowl and my poor baby threw up again. After she was done Noah asked her if she wanted a blessing and she sweetly said, "Yes!" in her adorable baby girl voice. So he gave her a blessing and when he was done, she looked at him, pointed at me and said, "Mama". I have been hurting a lot still since my surgery and she has been trying so hard to take care of me. So Noah gave me a blessing too, which was much needed. He went back over to her to talk to her and she pointed at him and said, "Dada!" And put both of her hands on his head. It was so sweet!

After that she rolled over and reached behind her to grab my hand. I put my hand over her little body and felt her soft sweet breathing making my hand rise up and down. She wrapped her hand in mine again and this time she was rubbing my hand, I nestled my face into her sweet smelling hair and she rubbed her tiny little foot along my leg. It was one of the most beautiful times Ive had as a mom. I really just was enjoying laying there with her, marveling at how I got so lucky to have such a sweet little girl. I felt so bad for her and how sick she was feeling but so blessed at the same time to get to have such a sweet moment with my daughter. It was something that makes motherhood so very special, sometimes we just need to stop and take in the beauty of what is right there in front of us. Such a simple beautiful moment that I am ashamed to say I would have missed had I thought of checking facebook while I lay there in bed with her. 

After a few minutes of just watching her drift off to sleep, I too closed my eyes and just took in how beautiful I felt. I just felt so much peace and thanked Heavenly Father that I was able to be there in that moment, that I was able to be a mom, and that I was able to be there in that bed at that moment creating a beautiful memory with my sweet girl. I always want my children to know I am there for them, I never want them to doubt that or to think that anything is more important to me then they are. I never want them to ever feel anything but love and safety when they are in my arms. I want them to feel at peace and drift off to sleep knowing that nothing in the world can harm them. There are so many things in this world that can distract us and our children from the things that are right and special and sacred. I dont want to miss one moment of there delicatness. I dont want to miss any of the small, sweet details of their lives, they are my babies and I am their mother and those are the most important things in my life (aside from my sweet husband and the gospel of Jesus Christ, its all part of the same thing for me). 

So much can be done and learned when we silence the world and just enjoy the beauty that is right there in front of us. The peace and the comfort and the beauty that is part of Gods natural plan for us. The rest of it falls by the wayside, it doesn't really matter when we just stop and look at the great miracles of life that are right there in front of us, these sacred little miracles of life that are put in our care as parents. They don't need much from us, they just need our love, our support, our safety and our presence.

This little lady is so full so sass and spunk. I just love it!! She is perfect. Im not sure where she got the kissy faces from (probably because we kiss a ton) but now she tells me to do it all the time, it cracks me up. I don't know what I would do with out her and her sweet little spirit, she keeps me grounded and teaches me so much about love and patience, she is going to be a great mommy one day and Im so excited to get to be a part of her life.

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